One day a visiting mother is surprised to see her married daughter opening the door naked.
"Why are you naked?", asked mother. "OH mom!! I wanted to surprise my husband with my birthday suit!!, replied daughter.
That day the mother thought about this brilliant idea to spice up her aging sex life. She returns home and suprises her husband one evening by opening the door naked.
"What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you not wearing any clothes", asked the husband. "Oh well, I wanted to surprise you with my birthday suit!!" "Aw!! Next time please iron it before you wear 'em", he replied!!!
I remember watching Sex And The City and one of the characters was going to have sex with this really old guy... and he says to her 'Just need to go get theViagra' and then he gets up... and all you can see is the silohette from the bathroom, she's in bed andsees his sagging bum... and she has to leave... My husband just turned to me and said 'that's so cruel...' But I looked at him and said 'that he would not of thought the same way if it was an old woman walking to the bathroom and a young man in bed...'
A newlywed couple just moved into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?"
The husband just looked at his wife and said, "What do I look like, Mr.Plumber?”
A few days went by, and he comes home from work and again his wife asks for a favor, "Honey, the car won't start, I think that it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?"
"What do I look like, Mr.Goodwrench?" was his response. Another couple of weeks go by, and it's raining pretty hard. His wife then finds a leak in the roof. She pleads with him as he's walking through the door. "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?"
He just looked at her and said "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" and sat down with a beer and watched a game on TV.
One weekend the husband woke up and it was pouring pretty hard, but the leak on the roof was gone! Speaking of leaks, he also went to take a shower, and he found that the one pipe behind the sink wasn't leaking anymore either.
His wife was coming home just then, and as she walked through the door, the husband asked, "Honey, how come there aren't any more leaks, and the car's running?"
She replied nonchalantly, "Oh, the other day I was picking up the mail, and I ran into one of our new neighbors, Jon. What a nice man. He came over and fixed everything." "Wow, did he charge us anything?" asked the husband. "No, he just said that he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or had sex with him" she said.
"Cool. What kind of cake did you make?" asked the husband. "Cake? What the hell do you think I look like, Betty Crocker?
i never thought of that but i guess that it's true too...
i hope you have been well, happy and enjoying your days. i see that you have racked up on amazing points at Dr. John's. Congratulations! that is awesome!
22 comments:
heh heh! I love Maxine!
I want to be just like her when I'm her age....whatever it is! ;-)
Thats phunny. But a little scary.
I think when you get up in age you cant see to well any way so sex should be no problem then LOL.
MAXINE ROCKS!
Good ole Maxine...
I'm still in my twenties and not sure how I feel about seeing myself naked!!
Just do it with the lights out!
omg LOL LOL
That is why there is the clapper!
I hate seeing myself naked now in life, I cant imagine what 20 more years will do!!!! That is why I like it in the dark!!!
ha ha!! here's a joke i remember on that!!
One day a visiting mother is surprised to see her married daughter opening the door naked.
"Why are you naked?", asked mother.
"OH mom!! I wanted to surprise my husband with my birthday suit!!, replied daughter.
That day the mother thought about this brilliant idea to spice up her aging sex life. She returns home and suprises her husband one evening by opening the door naked.
"What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you not wearing any clothes", asked the husband.
"Oh well, I wanted to surprise you with my birthday suit!!"
"Aw!! Next time please iron it before you wear 'em", he replied!!!
I remember watching Sex And The City and one of the characters was going to have sex with this really old guy...
and he says to her 'Just need to go get theViagra'
and then he gets up...
and all you can see is the silohette from the bathroom, she's in bed andsees his sagging bum...
and she has to leave...
My husband just turned to me and said 'that's so cruel...'
But I looked at him and said 'that he would not of thought the same way if it was an old woman walking to the bathroom and a young man in bed...'
Funny, I have seen us naked and wonder why?
With exercise and eating right I think people won't run away when I get older and I won't sag as much :) that's too cute
That is too funny!
Thank you for dropping by Cindy's Stuff!
God Bless,
Cindy
Ha ha! Here's another one for you, Catch:
A newlywed couple just moved into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?"
The husband just looked at his wife and said, "What do I look like, Mr.Plumber?”
A few days went by, and he comes home from work and again his wife asks for a favor, "Honey, the car won't start, I think that it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?"
"What do I look like, Mr.Goodwrench?" was his response. Another couple of weeks go by, and it's raining pretty hard. His wife then finds a leak in the roof. She pleads with him as he's walking through the door. "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?"
He just looked at her and said "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" and sat down with a beer and watched a game on TV.
One weekend the husband woke up and it was pouring pretty hard, but the leak on the roof was gone! Speaking of leaks, he also went to take a shower, and he found that the one pipe behind the sink wasn't leaking anymore either.
His wife was coming home just then, and as she walked through the door, the husband asked, "Honey, how come there aren't any more leaks, and the car's running?"
She replied nonchalantly, "Oh, the other day I was picking up the mail, and I ran into one of our new neighbors, Jon. What a nice man. He came over and fixed everything." "Wow, did he charge us anything?" asked the husband. "No, he just said that he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or had sex with him" she said.
"Cool. What kind of cake did you make?" asked the husband. "Cake? What the hell do you think I look like, Betty Crocker?
Funny and so are the other stories people wrote..cheered me up today...I need it.
I do not even look at myself anymore! Better do something to change that...
...And be sure to wear your medic alert necklace ;)
i never thought of that but i guess that it's true too...
i hope you have been well, happy and enjoying your days. i see that you have racked up on amazing points at Dr. John's. Congratulations! that is awesome!
hugs.
I love reading Maxine funnies! I don't think I've seen this one before! Great one!
You find the best possible cartoons but this one is scarey.
You did it again. Made me laugh
LMAO...laffed moi heart out..
Nice idea with this site its better than most of the rubbish I come across.
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